The Truth About Anger and Rage, It’s Terrible Effects and Why We All Need to Control and Heal It
Anger and rage is a disease, an affliction and a poison that we need to tell the truth about, heal from and gain control over in order to have a healthy, peaceful life of love, trust and well being.
Photo Credit: Nyima Fitzmaurice
Heaven and Hell—The Sumurai Warrior and The Zen Master
Story and Image Credit: Chinmayan
Anger is one of the most destructive emotions that afflict human beings.
Many people mistakenly believe that getting angry is a natural part of life that they have every right to feel and act upon if they are offended, hurt or “triggered” by someone’s behavior…. or given cause by anything or anyone to get angry.
“Whatever is born in anger ends in shame.” Benjamin Franklin
“When anger rises, think of the consequences.” Confucius
I know this ground extremely well because I come from a long line of men in my ancestral family who were rageaholics, which to me means someone who is easily triggered into anger, has their anger quickly become rage that they have no control over, and then act out this rage on their children, spouses and family…and strangers.
In that state of out of control rage, the kind, considerate and loving person that they may be normally is replaced by someone who is taken over completely at every level by their anger; who truly feels justified in expressing their rage with verbal, energetic and even physical attacks upon the one or ones their rage is focused on.
We see extreme examples of it happening on the daily news about “road rage” incidents, domestic violence episodes and people who get automatic weapons and kill as many as they can in mass shootings.
“Anger is a double edged sword that cuts the one who holds the anger worse than the one the anger is being taken out on.” Amma
Photo Credit: Chinmayan
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else…you are the one who gets burned.” Buddha
I will be talking more about this and in more depth in future stories, including my own life story of “inheriting” raging from my own father, who got it from his father, who got it from his father as it has been passed down from generation to generation in a poisoned stream.
I have known many people who are addicted to anger because of its power to warp your perceptions, give you a massive adrenaline rush and make it seem like even the harshest words or terrible berserk actions are totally justified. In their mind, anger temporarily give them “superpowers.”
I personally know this ground very well because from my young manhood onwards, I was an rageaholic on a hair trigger who caused tremendous suffering to those who tried to love me…my partners, friends and children because I was treated this way by own father through out my childhood.
Though I always vowed to NEVER lose it like my Dad did so often, and after years of being beaten, yelled at and punished severely for even the smallest perceived infraction…I was shocked to discover that as a “grown up” I was infected with the same disease…
“All wars, which are so destructive and cause so much suffering, are started by the tip of someone’s angry tongue.” Amma
In future stories, I want to honestly share more about this and how I overcame this affliction after years of struggle to heal from my own deep wounds and negative habitual tendencies through the unrelenting focused power of prayer, meditation, forgiveness and learning to love myself.
Being a rageaholic is extremely expensive…it’s like being a nuclear bomb going off at ground zero that causes vast amounts of suffering.
My years of being afflicted cost me dearly as my raging destroyed the relationship with great loving partners, with my children and caused the loss of my home and everything it had taken me years to build, and left me broken, poor and alone.
Photo Credit: Chinmayan
But for today, I simply want to speak as one who knows the destructive power of anger and make some kept points:
…out of control anger is a disease which destroys the one getting angry and those the anger is focused on
…it’s source is all the power of our hurt and inner wounds we all carry deep in our hearts being dramatically and fully expressed, which only makes those wounds become more intense
…it’s something that must be overcome, controlled and healed over time if we are ever to have a happy life of loving people and positive outcomes
…though it may seem impossible, with awareness of what anger really is, its effects and sources, we can definitely and absolutely must heal ourselves from it or remain its slaves
…Anger kills, its highly contagious, and causes deep emotional and spiritual wounds…knowing this and telling the truth about it can be the greatest motivating factor to work to gain control over it and heal it because the fact is…our very life depends upon overcoming our anger and helping others overcome theirs.
Image Credit: Inner Resource Institute’s Still Mountain Meditation Center
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